Sedateophobia
by S c a r e d o f S i l e n c e
Summary: Axel is an author, but goes slightly insane everytime he is surrounded by silence. His friends realize that they can't help him forever, so they try to hook him up with the smooth, mysterious, Roxas Scarret! Will be M later...
1. Chapter 1

S c a r e d o f S i l e n c e

_Introduction:_

Axel Troublefield was a very normal man. He was an artist; he enjoyed many types of art as well. Paintings, sculptures, drawings, and literature. The list goes on, but the only one Axel can find his deepest talent at is… writing. If he drew a picture, it was uneven. If he painted on a canvas, it would look like blobs of clumped imperfection. And if he attempted to sculpt, not even _he _would know what it was supposed to be or look like. But when that man put an ink pen to paper, it was as if he had the artistic talent of the angels; to say the least.

And Axel was also blessed with looks and kind-nature. He was tall and awkward, but that's what made him charming. And how much of a gentleman he was made everyone swoon or gain a deep respect for him. He was a bit quiet, but he could talk for hours on end if you brought up anything related to the subject of writing.

But, as every human being is, Axel had a flaw underneath all of his perfect ways. He was horrified of silence. If he was alone too long in a silent place, he would go slightly mad. You wouldn't know who he was anymore. But he most certainly wasn't the Axel Troublefield everyone knew. And after these fits of madness he'd have, it's a bit hard for him to come down from it. And sometimes he still isn't all together when he has to attend some sort of party or event for art.

Axel also lives alone in his small, private, condominium. This is why he developed such a scared, hateful feeling toward the silence. He got so absorbed in it. And he would wonder if he would get stuck in it one day and never be able to get out.

But one day, he found the answer to this question, and that answer was; Roxas Scarret.

--

Axel was attending a dinner party at a friend's home. Riku Torry, the friend hosting this get-together, had just finished a painting that had sold for a pretty penny and he was happy. So he invited some close friends and a few others to dine with him that night.

The redhead was close to the door when he saw the window on the front of Riku's home and a busy brunette inside doing some last minute preparations. He knew this boy as Sora Scarret. Or better known as Riku's partner.

Axel smiled softly as he saw Riku walk into that room and wrap himself around Sora gently, kissing the back of his neck softly and in a warm, happy way. And then he made his way up to the door and knocked a little softly, hoping it was heard. And just as he was about to knock again, Riku answered the door warmly.

"Evening, Axel." Riku nodded with a sincere smile on his face.

"Evening, Riku." Axel tried smiling back, and it seemed to work.

As Axel walked into the home, he was greeted by an unbelievable warmth that over-whelmed him as he took the first step in. And how wonderful all of that food smelled. He smiled once more at the feeling this brought him. And he was glad he wasn't throwing another fit over silence at home. In fact, he almost had done the exact thing when Riku had called and invited him over.

But Riku called for that very reason. He was worried for Axel's mental health and just wanted to keep him as normal as possible. And getting him into public more often where silence is rare, made Riku feel Axel's sanity was safer. The rest of Axel's close friends know of this problem Axel has because all of them had seen him in one of his episodes before. They were all at his home, visiting, and he was in the middle of it when they came, and they were just in time. Axel was about to accidentally kill himself with a knife he was using to cut some tomatoes before the fit had started.

The very next day Sora had taken him to a therapist and then a doctor and they believed that he may have had Monophobia, the fear of being alone, or of oneself. But none of them thought that was accurate enough. So they took him to different therapists and different doctors until they finally got a close enough to good answer for Axel's problem; Sedateophobia the fear of silence, quiet. And they all were worried about Axel from then on.

And that's why all of their eyes were on Axel tonight. Because there were some people there that Axel didn't know, and if he went into a fit for some reason, they wanted them to be able to understand. So Riku was telling a few of the people there that he knew and Axel didn't know.

These few people included Sora's twin brother that Axel hadn't met yet; Roxas Scarret. And Demyx Riddell seemed to think that Axel would fall instantly for the petite blonde. While Zexion Fay seemed to think otherwise. These two were their own happy couple, but were very opposite. Sora likes to say that 'opposites attract', but Demyx and Zexion think a bit differently about it. They think that it's just the way the other makes themselves feel. Because Zexion used to think people like Demyx were annoying, and quite frankly, they all are not including the mullet haired man. And Demyx was quite afraid of people like Zexion, but only felt love toward Zexion, no other stern, serious people.

"Do you honestly think they will click, Demyx?" questioned the lilac haired man.

"Of course! Roxas will make Axel so happy, and if they are together we won't have to worry about Axel at home hurting himself because Roxas will be able to help him through it."

"If you say so..."

--

"Roxas, come over here please." Riku offered the blonde, who gracefully floated through the small crowd and over to the man.

"Yes, Riku? Sora?"

"Do you see the tall, skinny, redhead over there all by himself?" Sora began.

"He's hard to miss, of course I see him."

"Well, we want you to meet him. He's very kind, and he's one of our closest friends that you haven't been introduced to yet." Riku picked up where Sora paused.

"Alright, may I ask if Sora will accompany me?"

"Of course I will, Roxas." Sora smiled. And the older brunette twin linked arms with the younger blonde twin, and they began to walk Axel's way.

Axel himself noticed the twins' approach and looked sharp, but calm, as he always did. He caught sight of the blonde and knew that he was meeting a new person. And Axel hated that almost as much as the silence that seemed to torment him. But Axel just sucked it up for now and forced a smile at the two.

"Good evening, Sora. And I'm sure we haven't met, sir, so my name is Axel; Axel Troublefield." The grace on the redhead's tongue simply intimidating.

"It's very nice to meet you as well, Mr. Troublefield. I am Roxas Scarret, Sora's twin brother."

"I hope the both of you get to know each other very well in the future." Sora smiled to the two, hoping something would spark. But the look in both of their eyes just remained dark. Sora took a quick moment to look over at Riku with an exhausted look on his face. This was a sign to the silver haired man that nothing was really going to develop between the two men. At least not right now.

Sora then whispered to Roxas;

"I'm going to be with Riku, talk to me if you want help. Have fun."

And with that, the brunette was gone.

Roxas looked from Sora's disappearing figure to the lean, tall figure of the redhead before him. And to tell the truth, he was a bit speechless. So he tried to find something to talk about.

"So, you look like an author, what kind of genres do you like?"

"Well, I generally write a lot of poetry. Sad, angry, and love poems most of the time. But I really like to read comedy, horror, and more poetry. And I just can't seem to write happy endings, so I like to read them as much as I can." Axel smiled, getting into the mood of writing.

"Ah, that sounds nice. I like to read, though I'm not too good with a pen." The blonde giggled softly.

It remained silent for a moment besides the small conversations going on around the two, keeping Axel sane. And then, the blonde began walking away slowly.

"I suppose since you know my brother and other friends of mine I will be seeing you around, yes?" The blonde gently asked stepping back with each word.

"Of course."

"Then have a nice evening, Mr. Troublefield…"

And with that, the blonde disappeared into the crowd. And as Axel thought back to the conversation slowly, he realized that the blonde right away knew he was an author. Most people, when first meeting Axel, think he is a painter, or a sketch artist. But this boy was on the spot. Was that strange? Or was it really that obvious?

Maybe… it didn't matter. So that night, Axel went home, confused. But not really. In fact, he couldn't describe his feelings at the moment. His thoughts were rushing and he didn't know what he was doing really. Did he have too much champagne? No, he didn't really like how the bubbles scratched his throat. So he didn't drink that much. Did he eat too much? No, that doesn't mess with his head unless he's about to vomit.

But no matter the problem, Axel didn't feel like he knew the answer for it.

And that; was what he feared.

--

So, when Axel's car pulled up into his driveway, he immediately jumped out of it and ran inside his home. He then rushed to his desk and pulled out a paper and a pen. He absolutely _didn't_ feel like writing, but he knew that for him that was the best time to write because it meant something was going to come out of it that he would be glad to have done later.

So upon his paper he wrote;

"_So many faces come and go._

_But none of them have emotions to show._

_And I can't remember how long ago,_

_I saw a smile with such a glow._

_Like yours_

_Behind the closed doors._

_And all the painless sores,_

_Make life seem more _

_Like a chore."_

And he was proud of the little pen that dumped out his words as they raced through his brain and he tried to catch them. And as the redhead read what he wrote over and over, he didn't know what to think. So he just shoved the paper away and went to get ready for bed.

Axel was in the middle of getting dressed when he heard _it _all around him. The image of nothing but _white _clouding his eyes. And then his muscles tensed. And he began shaking, and then the panic started. Oh, the _panic._ It made him so crazy.

And finally, the last bit of him that he had held onto so _well_ finally disappeared. He was not Axel anymore; he was the crazy man that he became when he was having a fit. And he fell onto his bed, clutching onto himself as hard as he could. And, shaking as violently as one could, he got up slowly from his bed and wobbled over into the kitchen, where he started to thrash himself into everything and anything he could throw himself against. His subconscious mind saw the blood dripping but didn't care enough to snap him back and try to stop it. Finally, Axel lost all consciousness and was out cold.

And when he woke up the next morning, he was still a little shaky. But he still had the courage to pick up the phone and call Riku. The ringing drove him almost insane and he was about to hang up when Riku's voice came into his clouding mind, it broke the urge to go back into frenzy.

"Axel? Why so early? Are you alright?" The normal assault of questions.

"W-Well, I am alright now, but last night I had an episode and then just crashed. I woke up in my kitchen with blood on the floor. But yes, I'm fine; other than that."

"That isn't something to joke of, Axel. You could seriously hurt yourself one day!"

"I know, but it's alright. It'll be my fault and no one else's. So if I bring about my own death, you cannot stop me, Riku. And that's okay." Axel smiled a lonely smile as he hung up abruptly.

He had some writing to do.

He pulled out the paper he started form yesterday and read it over once more. He really liked it, and he thought he should add something to go with it. Like a collection. His next book could be a collection of poems.

Axel was very enthusiastic about this idea and set off to write more poems immediately. But he wanted other people to agree on this choice as well. So he set off to Sora's house. Knowing Riku wouldn't be too happy if the redhead came over right after hanging up on him.

Once he reached the brunette's home, he was excited to know what the boy would think about it. They had never really read Axel's poems before, so he knew that Sora would be a bit surprised by this leap in interest.

"Sora? I want you to come and listen to this idea I have for my next book!"

"Yes?"

Axel was so distracted by the new bolt of inspiration that he didn't even notice that the person listening was indeed not Sora, but a blonde. Who was smiling in content with the look of enchantment on the redhead's face. For Roxas was only happy if Axel was.

"I was thinking about publishing a bundle of poems so I could really start expressing the poet side of my-- Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Is your brother home?"

"Haha, no. I'm sorry he isn't. He just left for Mr. Torry's home. And I don't think he'll be back soon. Mr. Torry called with quite an urgency that I can only express as him having a bit of… worry? And I think it's something about _you_, Mr. Troublefield. He mentioned your name over the phone as my brother was speaking with him. Something about you having an episode of silence? Do you mind if I ask, Mr. Troublefield?"

Axel found the blonde's speech to be smooth. The smoothest voice he had ever heard. And the way he called everyone "Mr." so formally instead of just their names or nicknames… There was something special about him.

"Well, I suppose maybe I should just visit Riku's home so I can talk to the both of them and ask Riku exactly why he was mentioning my name…" He wanted to show that he was also smooth, but at the moment was failing.

"No, no. Please join me inside, Mr. Troublefield. I _am_ quite lonely. Please join me for some tea?" And Axel just _couldn't _resist. He was lonely after all. And he really didn't feel like being alone and killing himself in the silence of his own home.

"Alright, I think I will. Tea sounds _very _nice at the moment." Axel ended.

"Wonderful! Please come in, Mr. Troublefield!" The blonde smiled widely.

Axel walked into the home he was already familiar with, but with a person he wasn't so used to yet. But he didn't mind. He would become familiar soon. Axel could feel it. And the blonde hurried off into the kitchen to prepare the tea for them. Axel just tapped on his knee while it bobbed. He was nervous for some reason. He couldn't express it. But the blonde always made him like that. And he'd only talked to the boy twice, including now.

When the boy was finally back with the tea, he had to excuse himself for a shower. He was preparing to paint for a wedding, and he and the couple had to meet and discuss what the painting would be of, how big it would have to be, and so forth.

And Axel stared as the boy glided gracefully up the stairs, wishing his smooth voice would come back. But Axel just sat there and sipped away at his all too entirely sweet tea. But after a few minutes he couldn't help himself and went upstairs to where the blonde was. Just to try and see if he was still showering. But just as he opened the restroom door, he felt himself lose it again. He crashed to floor, having it too silent for too long, and he didn't even notice.

Startled, the blonde jumped out of his shower with his towel wrapped securely on his hips. And when he saw Axel sprawled on the floor twitching and squirming, the boy screamed, but then realized that this might be what Sora and Riku were talking about on the phone. So the blonde kneeled next to the frenzying redhead, and grabbed him gently around the head. He pulled the rest of the struggling redhead close to his moist, wet, and warm body and cradled him. Whispered everything would be okay, he needed to calm down, and other little promises.

Axel finally snapped out of it after a while of hearing the blonde's voice. And he inhaled deeply at the scent of the boy's sweet smelling shampoo. When he noticed what he had done, he blushed a small bit, but regained his composure and wiggled calmly from Roxas' sweet grasp.

"W-What happened? Are you quite alright, Mr. Troublefield?" The petite boy asked, shaken up a bit.

"Oh, well, I have a little problem that makes me like that, but I promise you that I am truly fine." He smiled to the blonde, getting up and helping Roxas up as well.

"Please, don't mind me, get back in your shower and finish up."

"I'm finished already, you're lucky too. I would've had to leave you once more and that could have happened again. What if I had not been as quick as I was? Would you have _died, _Mr. Troublefield? I most certainly can't have that now can I?"

"I see. Well, Roxas, You must get dressed, am I right? I don't think your clients would want to see you in the nude. And, your guest doesn't really need that either." The redhead laughed at the last thing he said, maybe he really wouldn't mind seeing Roxas like that.

"I would fully appreciate it if you came into my bedroom with me to help decide what I should wear. If you don't mind. I mean, I am a man like you are, so it isn't like you haven't seen any of it before."

And Axel instantly became nervous. He couldn't turn down the offer, but would it be creepy to say yes?

So Axel opened his mouth up, ready to answer…

--

_Wait for the next update!_


	2. Chapter 2

S c a r e d o f S i l c e n e

Axel opened up and said the only word on his tongue that would make him happy with his decision.

"Well of course, Roxas. And please, you can stop being so formal and call me Axel. A-X-E-L, Axel. I'd appreciate it."

"O-Oh, alright, Mr.-- sorry, Axel."

"Thank you."

So the two reached Roxas' bedroom, and when this came, Axel didn't know what to do. Would the beautiful blonde in front of him take that towel off? How long would he _stay_ undressed? And many other questions flooded Axel's mind.

Roxas wanted to giggle, Axel looked so funny biting his lip like that. Like he was nervous. He also looked deep in thought, worried. And Roxas couldn't help walking over to him, of course the redhead didn't notice, for he was thinking. And when Roxas reached his side, he whispered 'boo' and began tickling Axel sweetly and gently.

"A-Ah! R-Roxas! Stop! Please!" Axel begged hopelessly while laughing.

"Ha ha ha! No way! This is too fun, Axel!"

"Agh! B-But what if, you're late?!"

"Oh my gosh! You're right Axel!" The blonde immediately jumped off of the taller man and went to work in his closet.

Axel was just happy to have the boy off of him, and sighed. He sat down on the boy's soft bed, and pulled out a notebook and pen he kept on his person at all times. Axel wanted to work on this poem collection he so desperately wanted to start.

"_How do I love you?_

_Do you think it's true?_

_I only wish you knew_

_What I would do_

_To you_

_For you_

_Only if you_

_Loved me."_

Axel had to re-read that at least ten times before he wondered why he was writing love poems like a head-over-heels sap. But then he looked up, at Roxas, who had put on a dress shirt and some boxer shorts already. And he looked simply amazing.

The shirt was a bit bigger than the person wearing it, and guessing that the blonde was already at the height he will remain over his lifetime, Axel believed that would _never_ fit the blonde; at least, not without trying to shrink it first.

And Roxas, noticing that Axel was staring at him blankly, looked at the paper slipping slowly from his firm grasp. After reading it over, the petite man blushed. Was that about him? Roxas immediately shook his head, trying to think rationally. Of _course _it wasn't about him! Axel was just writing! He's author for god's sake! Of course he's gonna write beautiful love poems with no person to direct it at.

And he also mentioned writing a book! So he's probably writing it for that, nothing to do with _you, _Roxas. But a part of him, wished it _did._

"I'm terribly sorry, Roxas! I didn't mean to stare." Axel had come out of his daze.

"It's alright, Axel. I don't mind."

"Okay… So, have you picked anything to wear?"

"Does that include something besides my shirt? Then yes."

The boy had on some black pants now. They really brought out how skinny his legs were. And Axel was staring again. But not for long, because he went back to his paper and wrote on the back of the other poem; and wrote yet another one.

"_How do you make me so breathless?_

_I'm helpless._

_But I really ought to care less._

_Because I'm hopeless,_

_Hopelessly in love,_

_With you."_

Axel smiled at his little romantic babbles and how useless they were. It wasn't like he really _was _in love right? He couldn't be. So he decided to leave Roxas for that day.

"Well, Roxas. It's been fun, but I'm afraid I must leave for now. I hope your meeting goes over well!" Axel grinned.

"Oh, alright then. Go on, thank you for letting me force you to stay. Ha ha…"

And the blonde felt… empty? As he watched Axel jump into his car and drive off, out of sight. Not to mention he also felt lonely now. But he had a job to do, and he had to go now. So after these last little preparations, Roxas drove away from home as well.

--

"Sora, I swear Axel is gonna die, and it'll be our fault not trying to help him through it."

"Riku, this is a _mental _illness. We can't help him through, over, or out of anything. All we can do is comfort him, save him, and treat him like the friend he is. We can also tell him it's all going to be okay for as long as we know it is." The brunette had to reason with his boyfriend. He didn't know what Riku would do if he lost pretty much his best friend.

"Do…Do you think Roxas will be the…one? For Axel?" Riku questioned, hope in his distant voice.

"Maybe he will be. But I doubt it. At the dinner party, Roxas and he were very stiff you know. It wasn't exactly warming, and they looked almost as if they wanted to hurt the other. But all of that was just in the _eye_ contact; I don't wanna know what they might have been thinking."

"Damn. Then we need to get someone for Axel…"

"I don't think it'll be easy.

"Axel is _never_ easy, Sora."

And they shared a sad, but cheerful for the moment laugh.

--

Zexion was looking for Demyx as Axel's car pulled into their driveway.

"Demyx! Axel's here! What are we going to do?!" The usually composed man yelled as loud as he could thorough the house, the most out of order he had ever been.

"Zexion, calm down. If Axel sees you panicking, he'll worry. That means more stress for him that he doesn't need right now."

"Alright…alright." And the lilac haired man took a few deep breaths and walked to open the front door for Axel. And Demyx followed.

"Hello, Axel! How are you today?" they both smiled warmly.

"I'm okay, as far as awkward situations go." The redhead smiled back.

"Oh, please tell us what happened?"

"Well, I went to Sora and Roxas' house to talk to Sora about this book I wanted to start writing; a poetry collection. Wouldn't that be fun?"

"Axel, the situation, not the dreams, please." Zexion added, noting how Axel was probably thinking about this new inspiration.

"Oh yeah, sorry. Anyway, I started just blabbing about that idea and though _Sora _was listening, but it turned out to be the boy from the party I was introduced to, Roxas."

"I see. Go on please?"

"You two are funny, how eager you are. But I'll go on. He wanted me to come in, so of course I did. And then he went to take a shower because he had a meeting to get ready for. So I was waiting, I even went up to see if he was there, but right before I reached the door; I went into frenzy. And the rest I don't remember because I can't ever remember my episodes, but I heard a faint voice. A beautiful one. It was so lovely, and I came back from my frenzy earlier than I would have. But I think Roxas was the one who saved me…"

"Wow…that's quite a thrill. Did he wonder about it?" Zexion inquired.

"No, because he had heard Sora and Riku talking about it over the phone before I came."

"Oh, and he wasn't scared of you, or weirded out at all?" Demyx's turn for a question.

"No, not a bit scared or anything. But he was worried for me. And I was very happy that he saved me. Now about the book I wanted to write…"

"Axel! Not until you tell us _everything!_" Zexion ordered.

"Fine, fine. We then went up into his room to…"

"Oh my god, axel! To _what!?_" Demyx yelled.

"To pick his clothes out for the meeting. While I was there he decided to tickle me, and then I wrote two poems."

"That's all?"

"Yes."

"Alright. Talk about that book now."

"Well, I wanted to fill it with poems, straight from my heart. And I wanted it to be perfect. I think it'll be real fun to make it because that means I get to write a lot. It'll take up my spare time!"

"We see. Can we read some of the poems you've already written?"

"Of course."

So Axel pulled out the two he wrote at Roxas' house and told them that he would show them the one at his house, which he left on his desk, later.

--

"Good morning, Roxas!" called Hayner.

"Morning, Hayner." Roxas smiled back.

"How are you, Roxas?" asked Hayner's fiancé, Olette.

"I'm wonderful, how about you two? I'm so glad you are getting married!"

"We're good too. And thank you, but let's get to that painting now? Please?" Olette asked.

"Ha ha, alright. Shall we, Hayner?"

"Well, duh! That's what we're here for, Roxas!" Hayner smiled goofily.

"Don't talk so mean to Roxas! You're lucky he's doing this for free!" Olette nagged.

"It's fine, you know how well I dealt with Hayner's 'jokes' when we were younger. I'm used to it by now."

"Okay, if you say so."

"Going back to the painting though, what would you like the theme of it to be? Besides romantic, because that's general and obvious."

"Hmm… I think it should be like, little angels, like cupid or something. In like a big circle or something, that says 'forever' in the center." Hayner suggested.

"I like that!"

"Alright, I think I can do that for you." Roxas smiled.

--

Sora and Roxas both made it home at the same time. Roxas was happy to see Sora and thought he should tell his twin about the Axel happening today. So he did, wholeheartedly.

"Sora, today that Axel person from the party came to our house, he wanted to tell you something, but realized I was the only one here. So he stayed with me a bit, and when I went to shower, he went into a mad fit, and I helped him out of it. Is that what you and Riku were talking about on the phone before you left?"

Sora sighed, defeated.

"Yes, that was what we were talking about. And you said you helped him? Calmed him down? How?"

"I just told him he would be alright, everything was okay, and that I was trying to help him. Things like that."

"Oh my god, lemme call Riku and tell him about this!"

Roxas was worried and rushed in after Sora, who frantically dialed the phone for Riku's number. And Sora gasped when Riku picked up.

"Riku! Roxas helped Axel out of a fit!"

"_What?!" _came the voice from the other line.

"Yes, Roxas helped Axel!"

"_I'll be over there in a second; we can talk about it then."_

And the conversation ended

--

Axel was back at home, reading, writing. Alternating between the two vigorously. He was angry for some reason. So he picked up his pen for what seemed like the millionth time and wrote:

"_My emotions flowing,_

_But only anger showing._

_Getting my body going,_

_Looking into your eyes, glowing._

_Now everything's slowing,_

_My sleepiness growing._

_You kiss me good morning."_

And he was pretty proud of that one. Though he didn't know how to categorize it. The other three he put into a romance pile. He would probably do the same for this one too. Or put it in a scrap pile anyway.

But after all this thinking, he fell asleep. And had a dream.

--

_Dream Scene:_

_Axel saw Roxas and ran over to the boy to say a friendly hello. He saw that the blonde was sniffling though, and asked what was wrong._

"_Roxas? Are you okay? What happened?"_

"_Oh… H-Hello, Axel… I'm not sure what's wrong, just a little down, you know?"_

"_I see; is there anything I can do to help?"_

"_Yes."_

"_What can I do for you then?"_

"_Stay here. With me."_

_Axel couldn't deny Roxas. He's his friend, and he has to comfort him. Because Roxas comforted him after all. So Axel sat next to the much smaller man. Roxas immediately latched onto the redhead, burying his face into the taller man's shirt. And Axel just cradled him until he felt wetness on the spot where Roxas' face was._

"_Roxas? Why are you crying? What happened?"_

"_I-I'm a terrible person, Axel…"_

"_Why? What makes you a bad person?"_

"_I…I fell in love with someone. Someone, who won't and never will, love me back…"_

"_Who? Who won't love you? You're a wonderful person. You have a great personality, you're talented, and I'd say you're very attractive, if it's not too awkward."_

"_It, it isn't awkward. And, well, it's funny that you say all of those wonderful things. Because the one I fell in love with, Axel is… you."_

_And the beautiful boy started bawling harder into Axel's chest again, Axel on the other hand, just sitting in shock. But when he realized Roxas was trying to worm away, he grabbed him swiftly, and clenched him close to his body._

"_A-Axel? What?" Roxas trembled, and then began shivering._

"_Its okay, Roxas. I… I've realized that; what and who I need have been with me for the past two days. And I was too blank to see that. I kind of, no. I definitely… No! I know that without a doubt, Roxas that I am so madly in love with you as well as you are with me. And I can say that proudly."_

_And with that, Axel proceeded to kiss Roxas gently, happily, and lovingly all at the same time. And he delightfully felt Roxas kiss him back. And it was heaven let loose. He felt so in love for the first time. And he thought about the fear of silence he had and how he would never have to face it again if he had Roxas forever._

_Suddenly, he felt the kiss get deeper, his body getting hotter, and Roxas come closer. They needed to feel each other so they were getting rougher and more heated._

_Axel got his tongue into Roxas' mouth and felt the blonde moan as much as he heard it._

"_Haa…Axel…"_

_Axel replied with more tongue fighting and he then tugged on Roxas' shirt, a signal for Roxas to start taking it off. So Roxas broke the kiss to appeal to Axel's wishes and pulled his shirt up and over his head._

_Axel growled when he saw the beautiful torso before him, reaching out and touching it made him groan. Then he brought his mouth over Roxas' firm, but soft stomach, licking gently and biting occasionally. Roxas just arched backward and moaned._

"_Axel…Please…" Roxas moaned._

"_Please what, Roxas?"_

"_Please, Axel… wake…"_

"_What? I don't understand Roxas."_

"_Wake up Axel!"_

_End Dream Scene_

_--_

"Wake up please!" He heard a distant, beautiful voice say. Probably Roxas.

"Y-Yes? Who…?"

"It's Sora, Riku, and Roxas." Came Sora's reply.

"Oh, why are you here? How did you get in?"

"Well, are we not welcome anymore, Axel? And as for how we got in, Riku and I know about the spare key hidden in your mailbox."

"Of course you guys are _always _welcome here! But you know that I would like a little warning first before you come into my house." Axel warned, not really wanting to have Riku and Sora's worrying heads in his emotions.

Maybe he was too busy thinking about the dream he had just had and why the hell it almost went the way it was heading. Toward rough sex with a lovely blonde. And even though Axel had a full blown erection, no one seemed to notice that he looked flustered and horny. Though Axel saw Roxas' wandering eyes land between his legs and notice the problem. He immediately gasped, blushed, and looked away.

Axel smirked for a brief, sweet moment. That is, before Sora began yelling.

"What's with that look?!" Screeched the brunette.

"Ugh… Nothing, just thinking is all, can you please leave? I'm not in the mood. I would like to sleep."

"Fine, we'll talk about it later then. Okay Axel?" Riku finally spoke up, trying to keep Sora from exploding most likely.

"Wait, Roxas, would you stay with me though?"

"Uhm… why not? I would be glad to stay for a while, Axel!" Roxas smiled brightly. And Axel beamed inside.

Sora and Riku just looked at the other with wide-eyes. Then they smiled, sly smiles, and then left without another word.

Roxas sat beside Axel as the tall redhead was still sprawled gracefully about his couch. The boy looked down at Axel's slightly softening erection and blushed again. He felt a little awkward and just decided to start their time with a quick conversation.

"So… what's _that_ about?" Roxas nodded toward the now-almost-completely-soft penis, a faint blush apparent still on his cheeks.

"Oh. That thing? Just had a very naughty dream. Something that a gentleman shouldn't do. But I did anyway."

"I don't think I've seen you act so… interesting, Axel. Are you drunk?"

"Ha ha. I wish I was; that would be the easiest explanation for this strange feeling and these even worse actions."

"I see." Roxas then noticed the papers all stacked and separated with the poems on them. "Have you written anything else? It looks like you wrote a lot more."

"No, I don't think I have. It feels like every time I write one, I have a specific feeling that inspired that poem, but I just can't completely explain it on the paper in a good way. Also, how was that meeting with that couple and the painting business?"

"Oh, it went well. They were both long time friends of mine a couple of years ago. They seemed to miss me, but I feel kind of bad… because to tell you the truth, I don't think I missed them all that much." Roxas smiled sadly down at the carpeted floor. It was covered in dark red, blobby stains.

"That must be awful. Not missing people you were once so close to. Was it hard to admit to yourself? I know it would be for me…"

"Yeah… it hurt my heart… It made me feel like I was a cold-hearted person… I still feel like a terrible monster because of it."

"You are the least cold-hearted person I know. How about that?"

"H-Huh?"

"You make the sun shine. With your eyes so divine. I need you, my love. Say you do too."

"W-What was that?" Roxas asked, feeling his heart beating with nervous flare. What was Axel trying to say with that?

"Oh, nothing but a poem. I made it up just now. Can't describe the wonderful feeling I feel though.

"And what is that feeling?"

"Love."

"Oh, for who?"

"It's funny. You should know."

"What?"

"You should go home now, Roxas."

"I'll call Sora…"

And Axel just smiled.

--

Sora drove over to Axel's house in anticipation. He was so nervous that Axel wanted to be alone with Roxas. They looked like they hated each other at first, but maybe Demyx is right? Roxas _did _sound nervous while talking on the phone. Maybe they had… No way! Not yet, Sora didn't know what he was thinking…

--

Roxas was as scared as Sora was excited. The blonde was bombarded with questions regarding his stay for like, half an hour with Axel. And Roxas was getting angry at the _kind _of questions that were being asked.

"What did you guys _do_?"

"Nothing."

"Was it fun?"

"He recited a poem he wrote to me."

"Awww, that's cute! What did it say? Do you remember?"

"Kinda…"

"Ooh! Please tell me!"

"Uhm… I don't remember it well, but it was about love. A couple."

"That's sweet! Do you think he likes you?"

"No… Well… Actually, I… I don't know what Axel thinks of me anymore. He's very hard to read."

"Well, knowing you, Roxas; I'm sure you'll dig deep enough."

"What…?"

"Nothing, let's just go home."

And Sora smiled, and that was the end of the conversation.

Roxas just couldn't wait to get home and sleep.

--

"Sora and Riku probably have this beautiful painting in the both of their heads with Roxas and I kissing in a romantic scene. But at this point, I don't know if I love that kid, or if he loves me." Axel spoke to himself.

Then he sat a while, and smirked to himself just as he went into a fit. But this time, in his head, all that was ringing around him was the sound of the blonde's voice cooing at him earlier. And he just kept smiling as he slammed himself repeatedly against his coffee table.

But his fit was interrupted by his neighbors calling the police on the loud banging his head was causing.

He was out of the fit by the time the police were there and one of them asked what the problem was. This policeman introduced himself as Xemnas Hartwell, and he seemed like a well man, so Axel began to talk.

"Well, I'm sorry for disturbing my neighbors, but I simply had writer's block. And we all know how frustrating that is!" And luckily for the smooth and very, very lucky Axel, they agreed kindly and left without giving anything but a kind warning.

And Axel was contently laughing as he realized that all of this shit was starting becasue he may have fallen in love.

--

_Yay! Finished another chapter!_


	3. Chapter 3

S c a r e d o f S i l e n c e

_I wanna say that I had some inspiration in writing this chapter. And it was created by reading a _breathtaking _review from _CarbonBlack. _She's simply amazing and I love that she's impressed (I think) by this story so far! Thank you so much!_

_--_

Axel woke the next morning with a huge headache. Most likely from his recent fit. But as Axel wondered why his head hurt, he also wondered why his heart contradicted and felt so…warm? Fuzzy? He couldn't tell, but it was definitely a comforting feeling. And the redhead smiled up at the ceiling that he knew was watching him and stood up to face the day.

As he was dressing, though, the front door was knocked on and he went off to answer it in just his boxers. He looked through the peephole and saw Sora, Riku, Demyx, Zexion, and…Roxas. So he immediately opened the door.

"Morning, everyone. Why are we all so early?"

"Oh, we wanted to know if you wanted to go eat breakfast somewhere." Demyx smiled. "But you're obviously busy I can see." Then they all started laughing, even Axel. But as soon as Axel stopped lightly chuckling, he heard Roxas giggle cutely. And the redhead felt his cheeks flush, smile widen, and heart swell. God, he _had _to have _some _sort of crush on the blonde. Even if it was puppy-love or something like that.

"I'll be right out, fully dressed, in a second. All right?"

And everyone nodded besides Roxas, who was staring and blushing lightly, his beautiful eyes wide and innocent looking. Axel noted this, and grinned wider as he walked into his bedroom again. When he came back minutes later, everyone had made themselves comfortable.

"Well, where are we going?"

"We haven't decided yet, sit with us and we'll figure it out." said Sora.

"Alright."

"So what do you feel like having?" Riku started to no one in particular.

"Breakfast, if you don't mind." Roxas said back in a sarcastic manner.

Axel had to laugh at that one, Riku really deserved it. And he was a bit surprised that the blonde had given it to him though, he thought Sora would have sooner or later. And that burst of sarcasm didn't look like it could _possibly _come from Roxas' big, pink lips. But that mouth _did_ look like it could make _other_ noises. Axel shook his head at that thought; poor Roxas, the redhead didn't _mean _to fall obsessively in love with him. He just is too charming to resist.

"I think we should just have a good breakfast here you guys!" Demyx said.

"Yeah! That would be REALLY fun!" Sora and Demyx joined hands and began jumping around in a merry manner. And everyone began to laugh happily.

Even Axel.

--

So, Axel's house was in gear; or at least everyone inside was. Sora and Riku were starting to cook up eggs, while Demyx and Zexion (under Demyx's orders) were next to Sora and Riku cooking some bacon. And Axel and Roxas were making toast and crepes.

And even though their efforts were high, and their appetite pretty much gone because of how… burnt everything turned out; they all still had the best and brightest smiles on their faces. And stomached the food.

"I can't believe we ate all that gross stuff." Sora giggled, leaning on Riku's shoulder.

"I can't believe you wanted _seconds, _Sora." Zexion added.

"It doesn't matter that we made vomit on a plates, it's the fact we did that with our friends and had a good time. I think that's why Sora wanted seconds. So we could make more and have more fun!" Roxas beamed from the couch, sitting next to Axel, who was smiling down at the boy; he was mesmerized by the look of utter happiness on the blonde's face. And he wanted to see that look all the time.

"I'll be right back." And with that, Axel went into his room to write something down.

But this time, Axel felt like he was more writing that of a distant love song.

--

"_I watch you from what seems like a million miles away. And I know that my relationship with you is imaginary. But I feel you comin' just a little bit closer._

_Uh-huh._

_And I wonder how lucky does this guy think he is? 'Cause he's got what he wants, piled on everything that he needs. _

_And I've got my paper, my pen, and my heart. But the thing I'm missing most, and needing most; is you. But I'm glad that you're in love._

_With me or not doesn't matter that much. Because as long as you're happy makin' him happy then baby, I'll be happy. Well, as happy as a lonely man can get. So when he's not happy, I'll try to help you be happy. Even if it's just in a friendly way to you. Because all I want to do is baby, feel you feelin' happy. As a lonely angel can get._

_I won't make you happy. I can't make you happy. But I wanna make you happy. Just over-joyed and sappy. And it makes me angry how angry he is when I'm around you. And baby I'm missin' givin' you a little kissin'. 'Cause you need it now or you'll never need it again._

_I know this song is gettin' under your skin and into your heart. I can see it in those eyes. The gorgeous baby blues that make it all you. That makes me sing nothing new. _

_Because all I want to do is baby, feel you feelin' happy. You don't have to make him happy._

_--_

And Axel smiled at the wasted paper miserably before folding it a little, and tossing it into the nearby garbage can. He would _never _try that again. It was _much_ too corny.

Axel then made a promise to himself. He would observe Roxas whenever he got the chance, and find out every little detail about him until he popped open with knowledge of the boy. From all of his dirty little secrets to little nervous movements. He wanted to know it all. And eventually, he would. And he would write all about it.

--

He rejoined his friends in his living room and asked what they wanted to do next. Zexion and Demyx had to leave because they had something planned. A date or something. And Riku and Sora left so Axel could have some "privacy"… those two were trying way too hard to get Axel to like Roxas. But the redhead's heart and mind beat them to that. He just didn't know when the blonde would fall in love with him.

Now, since everyone but Axel and Roxas were gone, Axel started staring at him. Keeping his own promise of observing the boy. Roxas quickly noticed through his keen blue orbs and blushed. Axel noted then that Roxas got nervous _very_ easily.

Axel scooted closer to Roxas, looking deeper into those eyes. The window to the blonde's mind, and waited. He waited for some spark, a trigger, _something_ new he could notice.

"A-Axel? What are you doing?" The blushing blonde spoke

"Nothing, don't worry, I'm not going to do anything bad, okay?"

"What!?"

"I said don't worry. I mean what I said."

"Alright. Just don't do anything you'll regret."

"What does that mean?"

"You're the writer, you should know."

"Heh."

And that was the last thing that was said between the two for a while. Axel just kept on staring at the blonde, making small mental notes about him. He already saw so many things about the blonde, so many little things that no one would take the time to look for. Except Axel.

He found that the blonde bit his tongue when he was thinking, instead of biting his lips. And that he looked absolutely innocent when trying to paint and get the image out of his head on the canvas. Yes, Axel eventually went over to Roxas' house to help him decide what and how to paint Hayner and Olette's painting.

And the final thing he noticed for the afternoon was that, sure, Roxas was pretty awake, but; when he was sleeping, he looked _gorgeous_. Especially when he sighed softly for no reason. Axel smiled down at the blonde that was now napping. He just wanted to reach out and touch him, hold him close, and treat him like he was the most precious thing on earth. To Axel, that's what he was.

The blonde woke up later; he didn't know when he had fallen asleep, and how long he had been asleep. But he was startled when he saw two beautiful green eyes staring at him gently. He then regained his breath when he saw it was Axel.

"You really scared me you know." Roxas whispered.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. I think you're really interesting to watch."

"Uhm… okay. Do you think we should go back to your house to make dinner for our friends? Sora and Riku said they would be back later."

"Why? Wouldn't you want to just have a quiet dinner between two intelligent people? I would. So… what do you say, Roxas?"

"I…uhm… What? What are you asking exactly?"

"I'm technically asking you on a 'date'."

"Oh… just you and I? But wouldn't that be a little awkward because we're both men?"

"Is that a problem for you?"

"N-No, I don't mind at all because Sora is… that way too; But I dunno, I just feel weird around you is all."

"Is that a good weird, or bad?"

"Can it be both?"

--

So Axel and Roxas were on a private 'date' that night. Just the two of them, no one else. All alone at Axel's house. And Roxas was nervous, like he said. And Axel was sitting and staring. He was nervous and excited about this all at the same time.

But then… he felt a strange feeling overtake him. Like a very _bad_ feeling. One that he was familiar with. One that would _destroy _his decaying insides. One that he _feared_. And then a word danced into his clouding head.

_Silence._

And he crashed into the floor, forgetting everything around him and body moving while he watched from his subconscious mind. Roxas immediately jumped up, worried about Axel. And in his state of shock, horror, and desperation, Roxas gently lay Axel on the floor and held his shoulders trying to keep him still. Then, he began doing what he did last time, just whispering hopeful things into his ear. Desperately trying to get the redhead to hear him.

But all that ran through Axel's pulsing mind was, "_Make noise, make noise, make noise…"_

And he would do anything to make that wish come true.

And then the blonde noticed that he wasn't calming down this time. His body was trying to thrash around even harder so it could break something or create a racket; than when he began. Roxas was scared and didn't know what to do. He leaned down and hugged Axel tightly, but it was still gentle, and started crying. He felt Axel's body heaving with every struggled breath he took.

"_What's going to happen to Axel if this goes on?"_

Roxas sobbed as Axel began trying to speak, little by little. "R…Rox…_Roxas_…"

"Axel?" Roxas was almost speechless.

And Axel was trying to force this fit to be done with on the inside, so far he was winning. He wouldn't let _anything_ hurt Roxas. Not even himself. So he was fighting.

Roxas just held onto him for dear life. He felt the slight panic breaking down and was calming his own mind as Axel's breathing was starting to even out. Axel opened and closed his eyes a few times before holding onto Roxas carefully.

"Axel! Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah. I am now." He whispered letting himself smile at how much Roxas cared.

"Thank goodness. Uhm, do you feel alright?"

"I already said I was fine, Roxas."

Worry and somewhat of a hurt tone stung the blonde's voice. "Oh yeah, I'm sorry."

Axel smiled at the blonde, and then tried to help him up. He accepted it quietly and stood with the redhead.

"Axel? Would you want to show me how to write?"

Axel was a bit perplexed by the question, but said, "I don't think I can _show _you how to write, but it's possible to teach you some basics."

"Alright, that sounds fun."

--

And they both were writing non-stop. Axel of course, was more skillful to say the least. And the redhead couldn't _wait _to see what Roxas had written. Even if it turned out good or bad, Axel would still treasure it.

Roxas finished his writing with a happy, but childish smile on his face. He picked up his paper, and beautiful blue orbs scanned for any mistakes and one last read through, before he handed it to Axel.

"I hope you like it!"

Axel smiled brightly; he knew he would. "Of course." He said.

Axel began reading what the blonde wrote:

"_I want you to know_

_That wherever you go_

_I'll always be there_

_With my worried stare_

_To follow you through_

_The deep water blue_

_Because I love you."_

And Axel was amazed. It was _wonderful_ for the blonde's first try at writing poetry. He muttered a quick "Good job, Roxas." Before handing it back to the blonde and sitting in a loving daze.

"Have you written anything yet, Axel?"

"Well, I haven't finished it yet, but yes, I have some little sayings and stuff on my paper."

"Can I read some?"

"It wouldn't hurt, so yeah, go ahead."

And so Roxas took the paper carefully and scanned through it with his eyes.

"_Radiance is bliss; can I please have one kiss?" _Cute. And Roxas giggled.

"_You're so amazing; I can go star-gazing, in those blazing, wonderfully hazing, blue eyes." _Sweet. Roxas liked that one a lot.

Roxas handed the paper back to Axel; he thought that if he read any more of them, he would get a toothache because they were all so sweet. But he really did like them.

"They're all _really _cute!" Roxas smiled at Axel, he didn't know why he was in an incredibly happy mood though.

"I'm glad you like them. I really liked your poem too. It was simply amazing and I was kinda shocked."

--

Roxas went back home from Axel's place and sighed as he sat down on the sofa in the living room. And he was content and his heart felt filled. He just didn't know why.

Sora was in the kitchen preparing his dinner when he walked silently over to Roxas with cat like movements, noticing the blonde was in a day-dream trance. The brunette was beginning to believe that the blonde was falling for Axel, and he was getting really excited.

"So, did you have fun at Axel's house, Roxas?"

The petite blonde jumped a bit, startled, and shakily replied, "Yeah, I had so much f-fun!"

"Aww, that's cute. What did you do?"

"Well, first we kinda ate some dinner, and then we wrote a little. Oh, but before all that we were painting over here for a while and talked for a bit. I had the funnest day today!"

"Oh really? It sure looks and sounds like you did!" Sora giggled, Roxas sounded like he was five years old again; running his mouth about Axel. But Sora was glad that Roxas may be starting to fall in love with the redhead. Even if it _was _just a little bit at a time.

"Sora, I'm gonna go to Demyx and Zexion's house to talk, okay?"

"Uhm… Sure? Be back soon though, it's already getting kinda dark."

"Okay, later."

And the blonde drove to Zexion and Demyx's house. And while he was on his way there, he did some thinking.

"_Why did I have so much fun with Axel on our date-thing today? And how could I have had fun? He had a panic-attack again… Why?"_

He had to know. And he thought that only Zexion and Demyx could help him understand. They were gentle, and they weren't forcing things on him like Riku and Sora were. Because they let Roxas pick his own choices.

"That must mean that I only had fun because I was forced into everything. I'm not showing any feelings for Axel, they are imaginary and fake. And now, I will never get the real chance to become good friends with him. It'll always be fake and cold! And it's all Sora and Riku's fault!"

Roxas lost track of the road and ended up just driving around. When he realized his car wasn't moving anymore, he knew something was wrong.

"Oh no… Please, no…"

He was stuck in what looked like the middle of nowhere with nothing but the darkness and trees and empty roads surrounding him. And he was horrified. He dug his phone out of his pocket shakily, and looked at it. He was relieved when he saw that he could make a call. He thought hard on who he would want to call though. He wanted it to be someone that he could take all of this stress out as kindly as he can, someone he knew would listen no matter what the situation. Someone he honestly cared for. And then the blonde thought;

"_Hey, what about Axel?" _

So Roxas picked his phone up and dialed the number with practiced ease. He heard it ring once, twice…

"Hello?" Axel's delicious voice came to the phone. And Roxas felt like he could cry out of joy.

"I-I'm stuck out in this place… I don't know where I am… Please, I need help…"

"Oh my god Roxas, you need to hang up for now and call a tow-truck or the police or something! Are you hurt? Is there anyone around with you?"

Roxas bathed in the thought of how much Axel was worrying about him right now. God, what was this man trying to do to him?

"Yeah, I'm fine. Nobody's with me though, and I'm a little cold."

"You should get back in your car then, stay warm okay? I'm going to hang up and you get someone to find you."

"Okay…" Roxas' voice lost all hope once Axel's was gone. What was he supposed to do now? Axel was worried and he could do nothing, great.

So Roxas picked his phone up again and remembered that he and Sora know a guy named Cid who was really good with mechanics and cars. And he still knew his number, so he called.

"This is Cid, how can I help you?"

"Hey Cid, it's Roxas! Can you lend me a tow? I need one right now; I think my car ran out of gas. And I'm stuck out in this nowhere place.

"All right, I'll see what I can do for 'ya."

"Thank you so much Cid."

"Anytime."

And they hung up. Almost immediately after that, Roxas called Axel up in record time.

"Axel, I got someone to get my car and I... I'll be okay. Are you okay? I'm sorry to have worried you so much."

"I'm fine, I was a little worried. But how can I not be over you? I'm glad you're safe. So very glad. And that's all I needed to know."

"O-Oh… Okay… Thank you." Roxas blushed brightly and was glad Axel couldn't see it. But was happy that the redhead was talking with him.

"_Why am I so shy when I'm doing anything related to Axel?"_

And after a while, the truck came. Roxas got in next to Cid, and they pulled his car back into town. All the way back to his house. And of course, Sora was there to play mommy to Roxas and give him a lecture about gas and responsibility and stuff Roxas frankly didn't care about.

Roxas just wanted to talk with Axel more.

And that's when Roxas decided to call Axel again.

"Hey Axel, its Roxas. Do you wanna pick me up from my house? I wanted to hang out some more. Yeah, I know it's late, but please? Yay! Thank you so much!"

And only an hour later was Axel at the blonde's house. Roxas squealed with girlish happiness when he saw the redhead's car. And he ran out the door. And when he hopped into Axel's passenger seat, he leaned over and hugged the redhead.

"How are you?"

"Uhm… I'm fine, Roxas. But are _you _okay? You're acting a bit… hyper."

"I'm sorry, I'm just happy to see you I suppose."

"I'm happy to see you too then." Axel smiled.

Roxas smiled, blushed and looked away. And Axel laughed brightly. The blonde was so cute, and Axel loved it.

"You're truly adorable, you know that?"

"Me? No, I can't be…"

"Hush, you're so very cute, and your modesty only adds to it."

Roxas blushed more, looking up at the redhead's gorgeous face.

"I love your smile, your kindness, your modesty, how cute you are; your entire personality. And I also love your eyes, and your hair, and your skin. Every inch on your body I love. You honestly could say that I love you, Roxas. With all my heart."

Roxas gasped, but wasn't scared. Maybe, maybe Roxas felt the same.

And Axel leaned closer, coming towards Roxas' face. His heart was racing at the thrill of the moment. Their faces were so close and getting closer by the second. And just before pink plump lips could meet eager lips, Axel pulled away.

"I'm sorry… I can't, I shouldn't do that to you… I know you don't reflect the same feelings as I do."

Roxas looked at him, hurt filling his eyes. He obviously had something to prove now.

Roxas kissed each of Axel's cheeks, his forehead, hands and nose before saying;

"Axel, you've proved to me that you're not just another one of Sora's friends who want to date me. And I was doubting it when I was stuck, but now I believe fully that I'm all you really care about anymore. You obviously don't care about yourself, so I'll have to do that for you. So please, let me be the one who worries if you're okay, who can fix all of your broken bones, who can bandage all the cracks in that lonely heart, please, let me love you."

Axel was stunned. He had no idea what to say, and he didn't know what kind of emotion to show. But he grasped Roxas tightly, he held him close. And he wanted to scream out of joy when the blonde didn't try wriggling away, but came closer instead.

"Roxas… Roxas, Roxas, Roxas… Mine… You will be mine, right?"

"For always."

And Axel grabbed Roxas and kissed him slowly, sweetly, and shyly. And the taste that can only be described as Roxas kicked in.

Roxas, on the other hand, was so happy. And for the first time, felt fulfilled. He kissed Axel deeper and deeper until he felt himself sitting on the redhead's lap. And that was when they both fully blushed.

Roxas removed himself from Axel and sat back in the passenger seat. Still blushing quite a bit, but smiling over at the redhead anyway. The blonde then grabbed Axel's free hand, and held it warmly and without hesitation.

"I love you." The blonde whispered.

"I love you too, so much."

And they drove off, going to Axel's house.

--

_Sorry, this one was late and it was pretty bad. Oh well, at least they're in love now! And CarbonBlack, I hope you like it the most!_

_EDIT:_

Okay, so chapter 4 is back up again. I revised it, a LOT so I think it's a little better please go on and read it, maybe tell what you think, if you want.


	4. Chapter 4

_And then there were two…_

_But what those two did, was all up to them_

_--_

S c a r e d o f S i l e n c e

Axel and Roxas, the new couple, were back at the redhead's. And all Axel could really think about was how did this happen so fast? He met the blonde just a few days ago and he was in love with him by at least the third day, and was his boyfriend in what seemed like moments later.

And Axel felt dizzy because of this. Or was that just because Roxas was staying so close to him? Axel didn't know though, and it wouldn't matter if he did or not. Because the room was feeling twisted, mangled, maybe somewhat spinning. And then the redhead seemed to drift to sleep. Despite the somewhat melting room. He just felt so _confused._ But if Roxas was the cause, Axel didn't mind.

Roxas mirrored Axel's thought track. He was spinning and in love. Was that how it always felt? When you've found the person you were made for?

But the blonde didn't want to mind that now. He just wanted his Axel. But he noticed that the redhead had fallen into a slumber. So Roxas just lay there, against Axel's chest, and gave in to sleep as well.

--

Riku and Sora were back at Riku's home. They wanted to visit Axel. They wanted to know if Roxas was with him, and if the both of them were okay.

"Riku, where do you think Roxas would have gone? I don't know where he might be, his car needs gas you know?!" Sora screeched at his boyfriend.

"Calm down a bit, Sora. Roxas can't be far off, he might be walking, or on a bus or something. Maybe, dare I say, he took _your _car."

"If that little… I'm sorry… If Roxas took my car I'm going to be very pissed at him."

"I know… But it's okay. If he _is _in your car though, let's think of where he would go in the car."

"Riku, I just remembered that _I drove my goddamned car here._"

"Sorry, Sora. Uhm… Hey! Do you think he might have run off with Axel somewhere?"

"Oh my gosh! You're right! What if he _did_? Axel can't have taken him somewhere dangerous though. He's probably safe."

"Yeah… Axel would never want to hurt Roxas. He would hurt himself first."

"That's for certain."

"Come on, we should check Axel's house; just to be safe." Riku ended.

--

Riku and Sora pulled up in the driveway. And they walked into Axel's house, using the spare key in his mailbox.

--

Roxas felt like there was a presence other than Axel in his midst. And that they weren't good people walking in. So Roxas forced himself to wake up. Stirring awake from on top of the redhead.

Axel woke with a start coming from movement atop him. He opened his sleepy eyes and looked at Roxas, who was rubbing the sleepiness from his own eyes. The redhead also heard people chatting next to them. And immediately looked their way.

"Oh… hey Sora, hey Riku." Axel croaked.

"Hello, Axel. We just wanted to know if you had Roxas on your hands, I see that you do. So Riku and I will be leaving. Have fun, Roxas!"

Roxas wasn't even fully awake during this conversation. He was after the pair had left, though. And was smiling down at Axel while he was shaking off the last bit of sleepiness in him.

"Hi… love…" The blonde's words came out slurred because of the apparent sleepiness clouding his senses. And it was simply adorable.

"Hey, Roxas." Axel cooed, leaning up to whisper into Roxas' ear.

Roxas let out a sigh of approval. And Axel kissed the same ear softly. And Roxas leaned further against him. He sighed again, but this time not as innocently. The blonde's skin flushed at the contact, and a little more than a whisper of breath was pulled from his throat. And Axel's cheeks flushed as well at the noise. How could Roxas make such noises and make _Axel _feel the same kind of heat. Axel pulled away from Roxas' ear and moved down a bit, kissing softly at his neck. Roxas moaned this time, not too loud, but much too soft for that moment. Axel groaned and flushed deeper at the sound, the blonde wasn't even that awake yet and he was making Axel… to be blunt… _horny._ And he was still beautiful.

But they weren't going to have their first time tonight. Axel thought that it was too early for Roxas to give up something so important to him so soon. So the couple would wait. Axel didn't want to just take it, that wouldn't show his love enough. And that's all he wanted to give the blonde.

--

The sun was finally gone outside and Roxas finally felt like no on was spying on him or Axel. Maybe as if the sun had eyes, and that's why it burned to look back. Roxas decided to show Axel some love.

Axel groaned as the blonde was kissing around his neck.

"Roxas… God, I love you…" was what the redhead uttered.

"Axel…?" Roxas asked, rubbing his head into the crook of Axel's neck.

"Yes, darling?"

"Can we go to bed? I'm sleepy…" the little kitten purred.

He smiled wide when Axel picked Roxas up and carried him away into Axel's bedroom. They were going to have a nice long sleep. As long as the blonde wanted.

--

Roxas woke in Axel's arms. He stretched a little, and snuggled closer to the redhead. He had never felt the way he did that morning. Sweet as a candy treat. Nothing more spectacular than that. He then looked up at Axel, who looked more gorgeous than he normally did at that moment. His unbelievably green eyes were gently closed, not clenched shut. And his hair was a mess because he had slept and it was getting messy from the pillow. His face was utterly calm, and looked as if nothing could disturb his sleep. Roxas felt so funny on the inside, overrated love story? Totally. But did he love how it felt? You know he did. And it felt so wonderful to be with Axel. Like no one before.

Roxas got out of bed as quietly as he could. Axel had had a good grip on him so he had to cat out of it the best he could without disturbing the redhead. He wanted to make the older man breakfast for treating him so well last night. What should he cook for the man? Something simple, to make him happy. So the blonde decided upon waffles and toast. Yes, this would be the best morning ever for Axel. And Roxas was glad that he could be the cause for it. He got to work on the toast, popping it into the toaster and waiting, waiting, waiting, _pop!_ It came up. And Roxas quickly buttered it and put it on a plate for his lover. And then, the trickier part came. How would Roxas make the waffles? He wasn't a genius and didn't know how to make waffles perfectly. Did Axel even have a waffle iron in his house? The blonde really hoped so, because it would really help right now.

So after looking through _all _of the redhead's cabinets and drawers, the blonde was stunned to find that there was no sign of a waffle iron _anywhere _in his kitchen. And decided that maybe he should eat something before he starts making his boyfriend something. So he sat down to some toast. It was pretty good; it had some butter on it and was warm and fresh tasting. Wait…

"_Toast? Didn't I make Axel toast?"_

Oh no, the blonde had eaten the redhead's food! What was he going to do? Wait… why panic when Axel's got a whole loaf of bread…

"_Damn. Of _course _that was the last piece of bread he had!"_

The blonde was losing it now. He walked into the living room to lie on the couch. He closed his eyes and tried to think about the situation at hand.

"_I could go and buy more bread or something for Axel, maybe before he could wake up? Would that work out?" _

But the blonde didn't feel like going to a grocery store at such an early hour of the morning. He felt tired and uncomfortable now that he wasn't in Axel's arms. And he also felt bad that he couldn't make a simple _meal_ for the redhead. This morning just turned disastrous and it wasn't even seven yet.

--

That's when Axel woke up. He felt the absence of something important, something _warm._ And whatever it was, he wanted it back _right now._ So he went into the kitchen to look, into the restroom to look, and into the guest room to look. And no one was there. But then he went into the living room and found a beautiful blonde lying on his couch. He wasn't sure if he was asleep, so he went over to the boy and saw those beautiful eyes were open, and looking at him directly.

"Good morning, Roxas."

"Good morning Axel." They smiled.

Then they kissed, it was a sweet quick one. But then they shared another, and another, and another until they turned into innocently sinful kisses. And then Axel stopped the kissing and asked;

"Hey, wanna get some breakfast?"

"Mmm… Okay…" Roxas said back as Axel nipped and licked gently at the boy's sensitive neck. And Roxas thought to himself,

"_I was gonna make you something, but I guess that'll have to wait…"_

"I love you." Axel smiled into the crook of Roxas' neck as he inhaled the boy's scent.

"I love you too Axel, so much…"

And they went off to go but some breakfast. So far, this morning turned out to be one of the best mornings of Axel's life, and he hoped it was for Roxas as well.

--

But, somewhere else in the world, not too far from the couple, there were serious matters being discussed.

Demyx and Zexion were at Riku and Sora's house, discussing Axel and Roxas. They were all very happy for the both of them, but they were worried if their relationship would last.

"I think it will last for a lifetime, maybe even a little bit longer than that…" Zexion started.

"I agree with Zexion BUT I think you two should _definitely _leave those two alone… They are really tired of the both of you." Demyx stated.

"What? Why would you say that? What are we doing that's so wrong? We just want them both to be happy!" Sora shouted, already getting defensive.

Zexion's eyes widened, so did Riku's, but Demyx looked angry and decided to continue on.

"You're treating them like flowers, Sora. You're overwatering them, making them feel overwhelmed. And I really think we should let them grow their own petals and get out of that pot that you've put the both of them into."

"You really think that's it? I'm not doing _anything _at all to them; they simply come to me for assistance. And I never force them into _anything! _You are obviously imagining things, Demyx!"

"All I'm saying is that you control or try to control whoever you already don't have eating out of the palm of your hand, Sora!"

And with that, Demyx grabbed Zexion's hand and walked him out of the house gently. All the while leaving Sora to ponder if there _was _something wrong with him.

Riku just stared.

--

"Demyx, what just happened?"

Zexion was scared, and Demyx was mad, but he also felt bad for scaring his lover like that.

"I'm not sure, Zexion. But I really do think that Sora is a sneakily controlling every one of us. And I think that sadly Axel and Roxas are the most unaware of this. And that's what makes me angry. You do know that they were kinda forced into their relationship, right? Sora _made _Roxas fall in love like that."

"So, do you think that Roxas and Axel would _really _be lovers, even without Sora's force?"

"I actually think so, because Axel was in love with Roxas even before Sora knew his game plan. But if Roxas finds out what Sora did, I honestly think he would hate Axel forever _just _because Sora made him love the poor guy."

"All I have to say is… poor Axel and poor Roxas… How long should this be our tragic little secret?"

"As long as it takes them to really fall in love." Demyx sighed…

"To be honest, I think we're _way_ past that part…" And Zexion knew he was right.

"Yeah… I think I agree. They are both so close already. Maybe it was meant to be. And maybe Sora isn't as controlling as I thought…"

"No, he definitely is… but what I'm saying is that, Sora may have triggered this, but it doesn't mean he's the cause. Because I doubt Sora of all people can control hearts and love like that. He simply just doesn't understand that well."

"That's a genius statement, Zexy…" Demyx smiled and kissed his little lover and then got back into the car with Zexion and drove them far away from the enemy's house.

--

Axel and Roxas parted ways that afternoon. Roxas had to go back home so he could work on the painting for his friend's wedding and Axel had to get to work on that poetry collection he had sworn upon.

So as Roxas returned home, Sora bombarded him with questions.

"Was it fun at Axel's?"

"Mmm."

"What'd you do with him?"

"Mmm."

"Are you mad at me or something?"

"Mmm."

"Fine. I'll leave you to yourself until you decide to act mature again."

And Roxas watched Sora walk away contently. Roxas could finally concentrate on this painting… how did they want it again? Oh yeah, the blonde had it on paper, so he could check it out. Now if only he knew where he had left it… Roxas found the paper and read it over.

Now… where to start?

--

Axel was back at his house, alone. And he hated it. He didn't like being without Roxas since he had so much of him lately. He felt like he couldn't really write anything without his blonde there to help and support him. He felt like somewhere where silence is always lurking, it was laughing at him while running full-speed toward his house to come in and blow the fragile redhead away. With or without sanity was completely up to fate. And finally, Axel's loneliness and how he needed Roxas there with him triggered a poem.

"_He's a lonely one_

_Nobody wanted him_

_And nobody cared._

_But I did_

_And he was scared."_

That one he wasn't sure of. It sounded love sick. But that's how he felt at the moment. So he wrote further.

"_It was cloudy today._

_I don't know why exactly_

_But I think it had something to do with the distant sound of…_

_Waves, the ones that I'm scared of because they look like they can eat away at even the greatest of swimmers._

_Or, blossoming flowers, the kind that make the sky shimmer that faint pink at sunset. Before it all just becomes a dear memory._

_Maybe even the sound of your whispers, riding the wind. You know, the ones I listen to whenever I can because your heart seems so far away and your voice sounds just like my heartbeat. And it's a really comforting sound._

_I dunno, maybe it'll be cloudy again tomorrow."_

"Whoa, where did _that _come from?" Axel asked himself. He didn't really know how to explain that one. All he knew is that it felt great to write it. And he wanted to do that again.

"_Yesterday, I counted the number of times I thought of you._

_And I didn't know they made numbers that big. And to tell you the truth, I also didn't know that I thought about you that much._

_But it's probably because of the fact that you treasure each sunset the way I treasure your breathing technique. Slow, steady, goes with the sound of the wind. And every time you exhale, my own breath hitches. And my head spins twice as fast as a carousel. But I love, love, love that feeling. And my heart quivers when you look at me, those diamonds embedded into your head just shining while my dull jades look back in an intimidated way. But that's exactly what you are. Intimidating. You also remind me of my mother, the way you cradle me when I need it but not in a childish way. And how you whisper your words that I don't listen to in my ear, but I just like the way tickles; tickles all the way down to my ankles, and then that feeling drips into the awaiting ground._

_But, that isn't anything special. It just is to me."_

He started a third one… What was wrong with him? And why did this feel so calming?

"_I really like your smile. And I know that sounds juvenile, but it makes me feel like there isn't anything to worry about. But really, (they think I don't know, but I really do), everything is wrong and nobody can fix it. But you smile anyway. Knowing everything might not be the same tomorrow, knowing that everything you love might be gone the next day. But not me. I'll always be waiting for you at your doorstep, at the foot of your bed, wherever you want me to wait. Even if you never wake up, I'll follow the fairytale and kiss you awake. And if that doesn't work, I'll just sleep with you. In a dark twisted eternity. That doesn't really sound as comforting as it used to._

_And you may not know it, but I'll always be thinking about the sounds I hear. Maybe they're all imaginary. But maybe some are real. I'll never know, but I'll always listen. So sweet dreams, perfect. I'll join you soon._

"I want to write… no, I _need_ to write one more…" Axel muttered to himself.

_I'm someone when I'm with you. Just not someone I'm familiar with. And that's really strange because I feel so real when I'm around you but that nostalgic feeling of being trapped is just barely beneath my skin and it makes my insides work a little faster than they should. But, then again, maybe that's just the feeling of nervousness._

_And it's funny because I'm like all because of you. But not in a bad way or anything. I really like you a lot. And I wish I could write like I talk because if I did, you'd love me like I love you and we'd be together to listen to the soundtrack of the strange world. It'll never be quiet again. And I'll be alright with it, will you?_

_Because if won't be then I'll take us somewhere where we can listen to a different sound. The sounds that break all the silence the ones that are always there but never paid any attention to. Like the buzzing of electric items, or the sound of our hearts combining to make a heartbeat. And I'll be by your side forever to make that noise with you._

And with that, Axel put his pen down. He stood, and he walked over to the phone. He needed to call someone.

--

Roxas was painting carefully and diligently; the way he always did. He was perfectly concentrated on adding the little wings with superior detail to the angles on the canvas so far. And he was about to add the word "love" to the middle of the angel circle… and he had to do it carefully and without interruption. One little mistake, and the blonde would ruin it all and have to start over again…

And then the phone rang.

Roxas jumped, spilled paint all over the entire thing, screamed in frustration and slight fright. Then the blonde regained himself and went over to pick up the little monster.

"Hello?"

"_Roxas!" _Axel was on the other line and he sounded abnormally happy. Well, for Axel anyways.

"Axel?"

"_Yeah, it's me. Sorry, are you busy?"_

"Well, a little, still trying to paint." Roxas looked over at the disastrous canvas. "Do you wanna come over here to write?"

"_Sure, baby. I'll be over in a second."_

"Alright, see you soon!" Roxas was already making move to dispose of the ruined thing.

And they hung up.

And so did Sora from the guest room phone.

--

_So sorry this sucked the first time (if any of you GOT to read it the first time…) but I really hope you like this better… (Even though I think it still sucks…)_

_Hmm… what is Sora doing?_


End file.
